There are moments in life where your whole consciousness just decides to get out of your body, and left you hanging doing stupid decisions. Well not that stupid, but still stupid enough to be called an idiot. Like that moment when a boy kissed you in your room, and not just a normal kiss, it was that kiss that includes tongue which is pretty nasty if you actually think about it, but as soon as you experience it yourself...is still quite nasty. You start acting like you were disgusted, but you actually liked it, and he asked you why you kissed back and you told him you don't know, and then 7 seconds later you realized that you were both guys and what happened was really awkward, and he told you how sorry he was and he told you that he'll never do it again. He lied and kissed you again, but this time it's less awkward than before and you were surprisingly pretty good at it. How did you know that you were good? he said so, and you believed him anyways. You both decided to take a little break and just lay beside each other doing nothing when suddenly your dad surprisingly opened the door and you both panicked, and just jumped and sit and pretend like nothing just happened, and your dad asked if you want something to eat, and you said no. You both laugh, and then he kissed you again. You asked "Why did you kissed me, and what are we?" He told you that he was really attracted to you, and that you were friends. You got confuse, because friends don't do stuff like that. You made him listen to that Ed Sheeran song, and the poor song just got ignored, cause he just kissed you again, and this time you were pushed against the wall, and you almost died because you were unable to breath. It was intense. Days passed and you two talked a lot, and act like you two are together,because he is being sweet and caring and shit like that,and nobody cared about you like that before, nobody made you felt that way before, all of it was new to you, and you think you'll go crazy if you'll keep it on your own. So you told your friend about it, and she asked you "What if you'll fall for him?", so you asked him and he told you that he couldn't promise that he'll be there to catch you, but nothing will change because you will still be friends and he cares about you. A few more days passed and you're starting to feel something, and you told him. He said he's sorry if he couldn't give back the love that you gave to him, but you're not in love yet, he's just assuming things hahaha. But you're feelings are really stupid and you are now 17.6 % in like with him, and that was so stupid of you. You believed in something you thought was a real thing, but guess he was just messing around. You were just too naive. It was not like the movies. Now he stopped talking to you. You can't hate him, you can never hate him. You though this time you will be able to experience love, you thought this could be the fairy tale that you always dreamed about, you thought he was the one you've been waiting for, you thought he could be the harry styles of your life. You thought. You were wrong all along. Did I mentioned that he was your first kiss too? Oops.
(written after all feelings have been destroyed)
